"How are you?"

Have you ever said something to someone in a conversation and thought, "Why on earth did I say that? I didn't even know I felt that way!" Well I had one of those moments today while talking with a good friend of mine in the church parking lot. She caught me by surprise by genuinely asking me how I was doing. As I responded to her I began to realize that I was feeling disconnected from those around me. Up until that point I hadn't felt like anyone genuinely cared what my response was to the "How are you?" question and so I hadn't really asked myself that question. So it surprised me when I answered her the way I did. As I began to pray about it later the Lord began to reveal to me that I do the same thing to others. I ask them how they are at times when they can't really answer the question honestly - maybe we are just passing or maybe we are in a location too crowded to share. When my friend stopped and asked me how I was she did so at a time when neither of us were pressed for time and we were not surrounded by other people who could have interrupted our conversation and so we were both able to openly share. It was refreshing. The lesson I learned is this: I must be intentional about when I ask others how they are and make sure to genuinely want to hear their answer to that question, otherwise I will leave them feeling the same way I was earlier today.

As I study the life of Christ, I notice that each of His conversations were intentional and genuine. He was never too busy to stop and minister to others, even when He was pressed for time (like when Lazarus was dying). He made it a point to connect with and make time for others and I must do the same. We are all busy and have stuff in our lives that easily get in the way of our connecting with others - the key is found in the second greatest command in Scripture, to love others as we love ourselves. This includes genuinely making time to ask others how they are, because we like it when people do this for us. You never know how that simple question is going to influence their day.